


Cisco and Pancho

by frogy



Category: CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-07-13
Updated: 2005-07-13
Packaged: 2017-10-12 21:05:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/129060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frogy/pseuds/frogy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nick has a heart to heart with his dad. Nick character piece. Post-GD. Talk of Nick/Greg.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cisco and Pancho

**Author's Note:**

> I've been working on this off and on since pretty much right after GD aired. I finally decided it's as done as it's going to get. It's my first real attempt at writing, be nice. Thanks to hawkeyecat for looking it over for me.

When Nick got out of the hospital, Grissom told him to take a few weeks off, which is how Nick found himself home in Texas, out riding the trails with his father. They are coming up on their spot, where the trail leads right up to the edge of a cliff. There's a fence to tie up the horses, and it's a nice place to ride up to, to sit and look out over the desert. It technically isn't Nick's and his dad's-it belonged to the stables-but they found this spot on one of their first trail rides together when Nick was little and in all the times they rode out there they never found anyone else in their spot.

As they came up to the spot they both stopped in silent agreement, tying up their horses and taking their customary seats overlooking the desert.

Nick's dad, Roger, breaks their silence. "Pancho, you're happy in Vegas, right?"

Nick is startled and turns to his dad. "Yes," he says, giving his dad a questioning look.

Roger continues, "It's just that you work so much, and you just seem to get the bad end of the deal every time. You know that coming home doesn't mean you gave up."

This whole conversation is surprising Nick. He had no idea how well his dad could read him. "It's not about giving up. I could never just leave. I owe them all too much, especially Grissom. I can't just up and leave, and I like my job. I really am happy."

"Okay, okay, I believe you, Pancho," Roger concedes, entirely unconvinced as the two of them sink into silence again.

Nick isn't sure how to explain that being here just makes it all the more clear to him that Vegas is home now. Just looking out at the desert, Nick wouldn't have been able to tell that it's been over 20 years since he and his dad first came to the spot, but everything else has changed. Nick's changed. Nick knows he's supposed to be use the time off to recover, but he's okay. Okay doesn't mean he's good, but it's not the first bad thing to happen to him and he really is a stable guy.

What Nick's not okay with is realizing that he's been a bad son. During the whole thing, Nick knew his parents were there. He's not sure how, but he knew they were in Vegas trying to help. No matter how much he ran away from them, they were always there for him. They weren't always happy with what he was doing, but they always loved him, and they always trusted him. Nick never gave enough back of either, and he thinks it's time to start.

So the next time it's Nick who speaks up. "Cisco, you and Mom love me, right?"

"Of course we love you." It's Roger's turn to be surprised.

"And nothing I say or do would change that, right?" Nick's voice is calm, but he's turned away from his dad, looking out over the desert, refusing to meet his dad's eyes.

It's the looking away that scares Roger. The two of them have always been close, probably comes from being two of three guys in a house of women, and Nick's dad doesn't think he's ever seen Nick afraid of him. "Of course not, Pancho. What's wrong? Are you in some kind of trouble?" Roger sounds a bit panicky.

"No, It's just that I..." Nick takes three slow, audible breaths, focusing his sight on a desert shrub on the horizon before spitting the rest out. "I'm gay."

Silence. Roger is trying to rapidly process this huge . . . thing. He's not doing so well. The first thing that makes it out of his mouth is "Oh . . . are you sure?" The hesitation is clear in his voice.

Nick, on the other hand, had found his voice, and his answer rings strong and clear. "Yes."

Immediately, "How long. . ."

Nick's not sure what the question is, exactly, but he decides to go with "College," which is when he finally admitted it to himself.

"That's half your life." Roger's reply is quick this time and slightly accusatory. Even he's not really sure what he was asking, but that's a long time for Nick to have lied and hidden himself, and while he still hasn't really registered an emotion about the declaration, he has no trouble feeling hurt and a little bit betrayed.

Nick's on edge and the longer it goes without a concrete response from his dad, the more defensive he gets. "I've been gay my whole life." He's amazed at how easy it is to say now that he's said it once.

"No, how long you've known and haven't said anything?"

"And you still haven't said whether or not you hate me for it."

"Never, you're still the same, Pancho."

Nick lets out a breath he was completely aware he was holding and finally turns to look at his dad.

It finally clicks for Roger that Nick's afraid of losing him, and Roger continues. "You surprised me with this, and I'm not really sure what to think. I always thought we were close. You know, Cisco and Pancho, the two guys. I feel like I should have known somehow. But you've been running away for a long time, haven't you?"

Nick's not sure if he's supposed to answer that or not. He's said his piece. Now he wants to hear from his dad, so he stays quiet.

Roger was hoping for a response, but Nick's not giving him one so he continues. "Listen, you were honest with me, so I'm gonna be honest with you. I'm not going to pretend to be thrilled with this, because I'm not. But you're still my son, and I still love you, and I want you to be happy. And I think I'm going about this all wrong, so you can chime in any time now."

Somewhere in the middle of his dad's speech, Nick's worried, pained expression came back. "I don't know what you want me to say."

Roger is realizing he knows nothing about Nick's life. Nick is always reassuring him how happy he is, but he has never heard any of it and is suddenly curious. "Tell me about something happy in your life. Are you seeing anyone?"

"Yeah, I am. Greg. You might have met him at the lab."

"I don't remember him." Roger can finally hear the happiness in Nick's voice, but what he says next doesn't fit the new mood. "We were a little preoccupied when we were in Vegas"

Nick glosses over the second part of the statement. "Are you sure? He's a bit taller than me, younger, skinny, crazy hair..." Nick's amazed that anyone can be in the same room as Greg and not remember him. Nick can feel it when Greg enters the room, and if Nick's looking at Greg or talking to him Nick still finds it hard to focus on anything else.

"I'm sorry Pancho, I don't remember him. How long have you two been seeing each other?"

"A little over three years."

"No wonder you wouldn't think of leaving Vegas. You two live together?"

"Yeah. He finally moved into my place... oh wow, I guess it's almost a year ago now. Living with Greg is an experience. He's got these crazy fish tanks, and expensive coffee, and it's not so much that he's unorganized as it is things are organized by some weird Greg logic that no one else gets, least of all me." Nick could go on about the wonders of Greg forever.

Roger is just glad that the conversation is finally comfortable and honest. "It can't be as bad as when you have kids. That's really when all order goes to hell."

"Oh... I wouldn't know."

Roger is afraid he's ruined it. "Sorry. Is that a bad topic?"

"No, not really. Even if we weren't two guys, work is crazy and..." Nick and Greg have never even talked about kids, but Nick's pretty sure it's not in their future and he's not that happy with that thought. "Did I tell you we went to California on vacation a few months ago? Now that was crazy, in a good way."

"No, where did you go?"

"Well, Greg's from right outside L.A. and then he went to Stanford, so we went to San Francisco where a bunch of his college buddies still are."

"So you met his parents?" Roger's slightly jealous. Nick met the in-laws before he even knew they existed.

"His mother drove up to spend a day with us while we were there." They went to a museum and had dinner in Chinatown. Nick felt slightly awkward about the whole, thing but Greg's mom was nice. She was much more like Nick's parents than he expected her to be. Somehow he expected someone a lot more wild, crazy and out-there to be Greg's parent, but she was very motherly.

"You'll have to bring Greg home to Texas next time you guys can get vacation time together." That wasn't what Roger was thinking when he spoke, but he realizes how true it is. Greg sounds like a really interesting person, and he's obviously a huge part of Nick's life.

Nick thinks that's a great idea. Greg owes him after California. "Greg's gonna have to do a lot of embarrassing line dancing with some Dolly Parton-esqe woman to make up for California."

"I sense a story."

Nick's heard a lot of his dad's wild stories from his youth, and his dad's heard a fair share of Nick's stories so he doesn't pause before starting. "So, you know I can put away a case of beer no problem?"

"Yeah, so?"

"So, we're doing shots and drinking some type of colorful mixed drinks and damn it's strong, because before I know it, I'm completely gone. And this is where the night gets fuzzy. Somehow, we're outside and I'm having a conversation with this drag queen and I can't decide whether to use sir or ma'am, and I'm just generally making a fool of myself."

Nick just realized how this story ends, and hesitates for a second. But his dad is nodding and laughing and uh-huh-ing in all the right places so he keeps on going.

"Somehow, this winds up with me in drag at Fisherman's Warf, which the locals avoid because it's a 'horrible tourist trap.' Except the whole point of this excursion was to terrify the out of town-ers and take horribly embarrassing pictures of me. Of course, I have no recollection of this whole last part. The only reason I know it is because they had a hell of a good time showing me pictures and telling me all about it."

Roger is outright laughing now, and it takes him a second to catch his breath. "That sounds like when your mother and I went to France."

"What, you wound up in drag?" Now Nick is interested; he's heard a lot of stories over the years, but he's pretty sure he's never heard this one.

"No, there was just horrible culture shock. We went to a beach, and you know women don't shave there. I guess your mother wasn't as discreet as she thought she was in being disgusted. All of these horribly offended, topless, French women come up and start jabbering in French to her and gesturing wildly. I step up to protect her, and suddenly a bunch of Speedo-wearing French men join the fray. We stuck to museums after that."

Now it's Nick's turn to laugh- culture shock, indeed. "There's no place like good old Texas."

"No, there certainly isn't." Roger smiles and shakes his head. "It's really great to hear you laughing." Ruefully, "We should head back before your mother starts to worry."

"Okay." Normally he would argue about leaving because the weather is perfect, the desert is gorgeous, and he never gets to go riding in Vegas, but the whole day was an emotional rollercoaster and he was ready to go home and maybe sneak out to call Greg, so Nick gets up and turns to where the horses are.

Roger gets up a moment after Nick does, and reaches out to stop him. "Are you going to tell your mother?"

Nick takes a deep breath before answering that one. "I'm going to try." There's a pause. "Please don't say anything about it before I do."

"Don't worry, I won't." Nick's dad hesitates for a second. A moment later, Nick's pulled into a bone-crushing hug. This time, when Roger speaks, his voice is hoarse, and filled with emotion. "Thank you, Pancho." It's a thank you for being honest, a thank you for sharing your with him, a thank you for trusting him.

"No, Cisco, thank you." Nick's thank you is for sticking by him, for never abandoning him, and, for despite everything, still loving him.

It lasts a moment before they separate and head over to their horses. They untie their horses, and mount up to head home. Nick takes one look back at their spot, before turning around and getting on the trail behind his dad as they ride back in comfortable silence.  


 


End file.
